The move to Dr. David Austin at Holdsworth House was a good move, made on recommendations from friends. The practise was well located in Darlinghurst, David himself was young, handsome, HIV/AIDS knowledgeable…and gay, as were all the men in the practise, which made communication easy.

The one good thing about David was that he was willing to make me an equal “partner” in my health management. This far down the line, I wanted more control over decisions made in regards to my health. When it came time to change my combination therapy, David would pick out a number of combinations, give me the run-down on them…efficacy, potential side effects…then I would choose the one that suited me.

Between late 1999-2001 I applied for several trials, but was disallowed due to having had CMV. A lot of my focus changed to controlling the ongoing pain from my peripheral neuropathy (which eventually became numbness), I tried acupuncture… through 407 Medical Practise in Bourke St…went to a reflexologist in Queenscliff, who was running a research project with subjects with ongoing PN. I then had regular sessions with Greg Milan, a reflexologist associated with Holdsworth House. Despite some minor improvements using these alternatives, nothing worked in a major way, and it became obvious that it was permanent, and I just had to deal with it…right up until now, where it affects my mobility and balance, controlled through exercise physiology.

Also in late 1999 I started part-time work at the HIV Prescribers Project, thanks to Lavinia Crooks (RIP) at ASHM (Australian Society for HIV Medicine) who managed it at the old (now long gone) Royal South Sydney Hospital, in Zetland. This project ran training courses for doctors wishing to expand their HIV knowledge, and become S100 Prescribers. In mid 2000 the project moved from Zetland, to the ASHM offices in the Albion St Clinic building. I helped to collate the training manuals etc for the courses which were run several times a year.

In late 2000, David…my partner, not my doctor…and I decided to do a two week trip through the Red Centre while the Sydney Olympic Games were on. We caught The Ghan from Sydney (back then it alternated between Sydney and Melbourne) to Alice Springs…the end of the line back then…via Adelaide, then coached it up to Darwin. A truly awe-inspiring holiday, away from the madness of Sydney. On returning to Bondi, I then decided to legitimise my writing with a degree in writing from UTS…I was writing regularly for Talkabout then…and applied under the exceptions granted to mature age and disabled students, and was accepted. I quit my job at HIV Prescribers, and entered into a period of educational advancement.

I applied to do a Batchelor of Writing degree, though found university not to my taste. It reminded me a lot of school…which I hated…and many of the first year subjects had nothing to do with writing, which frustrated me. For the second and third years, I juggled subjects around to fit with what I wanted, and at the end of that period I had enough subjects passed to get a Graduate Certificate of Writing, which I settled for. While at UTS I had several articles published in “Vertigo”, the university newspaper, and was office-bearer for the Disability Collective. Dealing with student bureaucrats drove me crazy, and I wrote a number of heated letters blasting the Student Union for not offering reduced costs in fees to disabled and pensioner students. Naturally, all to no avail.

Midway through 2003, while finishing my writing degree, I started at East Sydney TAFE to get my chef’s credentials. Apart from writing, my other passion was cooking. Unlike UTS, I loved TAFE. The students were more down-to-earth, and genuinely loved the learning experience, not being hindered by the strictures of university. I also embarked on a correspondence course to get my Catering Certificate. So, by 2004 I had three new credentials under my belt.

Back to 2001, I went onto my second-last trial…and it was a doozy that I got paid $650 to do. It was called the Caprine Antibody HRG214 trial…more commonly known as the Goat Serum antibody trial…Phase 1. It was done by infusion at St. Vincent’s, followed by a two month observation period. Again, at the end of it, nothing was achieved except a sore arm from the 12 attempts to get a cannula in it, and an all-over skin rash at the end of the second month.

The last trial was in 2004, and both David and myself were involved in it. Back in 2000 I was knocked back from doing the T20 trial due to my CMV, but the criteria was made less stringent as time went on, and so in 2004 we both got into the T20 trial. This was an injectable drug vaccine trial that was seen as the possible future for drug regimes. The drug was administered into an area of body fat using a pneumatic gun. Initially, it was great…pretty well pain-free, quick, easy, and very effective according to pathology results. However, because you had to do it twice a day, it soon became notable that injection sites got painful, and you soon ran out of them. It could also cause serious bruising which put an injection site out of action until the bruise cleared. We both got about halfway through, then quit. Evidently a lot of others had similar problems.

Other events for that year were (A) my 50th birthday, a truly big event that I dragged out for two weeks. Highlights included David taking the wrong batch of…cookies…to Palms, and getting banned from The Colombian Hotel in Darlinghurst, due to my tendency to stagger. They later apologised for the behaviour of their bouncers (B) I wanted to open a business, but had no idea about how to go about it. I decided to go through a BGF return-to-work course, to see where it would lead. Fortunately, I ended up with Marie Crosbie as my advisor. She soon clicked that I didn’t really need what the course provided, and asked me what I really needed. Between the two of us, we put together the bare bones of starting a business and (C) we decided to move to a house in Dulwich Hill so we could have room to rescue dogs. We are both Jack Russell Terrier lovers, and that love of rescuing them exists right up to today. There is a notable lack of HIV information at this stage, as everything was now running smoothly, and it was moving further and further into the background of my life.

Dulwich Hill, with our two Jack Russell’s, provided a new approach to many things. I started a high-end catering business called Alderman Catering. This lasted about two years, before exhaustion finally ended it. Catering is a youngish persons business. It takes three days to put a functions finger food together. A day for shopping, a day for prep work, and a long day of cooking packing and serving. It really wears you out. I rejigged my business plans, and fell back into my old retail career, as it was something I knew, and was successful with…but I leapt onto a retail format that is only mew really popular…an online store (I could run it from home with minimal start-up expenses, and minimal overheads) called Alderman Providore, specialist in non-perishable Australian made food products from small, unknown niche suppliers. It was incredibly successful with a constant yearly growth, and then the addition of another specialist store called TeaCoffeeChocolate. What brought it all to an abrupt end was the Global Financial Crisis in 2009/10. Online businesses were the first to crash. I put the business up for sale, and sold it to a woman in Queensland.

It was soul destroying.

Around the same time I started having problems with my blind left eye. It was constantly irritated, like there was something in it that wouldn’t come out. I went to the eye clinic at Royal Prince Alfred Hospital at Camperdown. They found that the eye didn’t realise it was blind, and had created a new capillary network to feed the eye. This in turn caused the eye to swell, thus the irritation. They gave me steroid drops, and referred me to the Sydney Eye Hospital. After a consult, they decided to inject a cancer serum (Avastin), that stopped blood flow to tumours, to stop the blood vessel growth. It was successful, however over time, the eye changed colour, giving me two different coloured eyes. Talk about attention grabbing!

Also in 2009; I got out of the shower one morning, caught sight of myself in the mirror, and thought “who is that fat person in here!”…yep, it was me. So off to a local gym, and a new love affair with Les Mills Body Pump classes. The weight burnt away, and started me on an ongoing love of fitness which still goes on today, though in a more senior person way. Fit, healthy, active is my mantra now;

In 2011 we decided to move to Brisbane. No particular reason why…just because we could! So we packed up our home, got a removalist, filled the car, grabbed the dogs and moved to Ashgrove, a suburb of Brisbane. I had been told back in 1996 that due to all the scar tissue in my right eye, due to the CMV, it was highly likely I’d have a retinal detachment at some stage. No sooner had we gotten to Ashgrove than the retina decided it was time. So, into Royal Brisbane hospital for an operation to reattach it. The ophthalmologist also scraped down the scar tissue before reattaching it.

Leap forward to early 2015, and problems with my left eye continued. In the intervening years, all the eye’s internal workings had collapsed, so I made a decision to have the eye removed. Another operation, and it was gone. Shortly after, David and I returned to Sydney…we had split amicably in 2014, and are still close friends…and it was here that I had my prosthetic fitted.

In 2017 I was interviewed and photographed for a chapter in the HIV Book Project. It was here, for the first time, that I revealed my rather radical approach to HIV drug dosing In 2011. In an era where we were still dosing on 3-4 drugs twice a day, and guys were opting for drug holidays despite the risks, I opted…without disclosing to anyone…for a different approach. It was risky, but done with close observation to blood test results. Sick of pills, sick of side effects, I halved my daily dosing to once a day, and no pills on weekends. If my CD4s fell, or my viral load rose, straight back to my old routine. In the 5 years I did this, my CD4s continued to rise and my viral load remained undetectable. Interesting, isn’t it! Read my chapter in the book to find out my true feelings about this.

Apart from an extremely painful run-in with shingles in 2014, which has left me with neuralgia and partial numbness in my left arm and hand, and 5 weeks of radiation on a large Basil Cell Carcinoma behind my left ear last year, life is really great. My Jack Russell, Flash, and I live very happily in a social housing villa on the Central Coast of NSW. I’m on a category 3 home support package…with the addition of Assistive Technology funding…so have some cool technology to help me see to do hobbies. Someone comes in to clean, and helps me with shopping. My Exercise Physiology gym is a 2 minute walk away. Friends are close by, and I have great neighbours.

I obtained my Certificate III in Fitness back in 2012, and ran seniors exercise classes locally until 2 years ago, when I got my villa. I avoided COVID, and apart from writing about it, HIV could not be further from my mind. These days, ageing…the one concern I once thought would never happen…is, at 72, my biggest concern. I now use a walking stick to control my meandering feet, and only take antivirals once a day. I’m happy, and content. What else does one need!

So what have I learnt about myself over the last 43 years…and even earlier than that? Well, I’m certainly resilient! I’m an independent guy, and an individual. I’ve retained a sense of humour…though somewhat dark and sarcastic. I’m glad I’ve always been an out gay man, and I am what I am, and where I am, doing the things I love due, in large part, because I’m HIV, and had AIDS. There is a kind of perversity in that! If I had my time over, would I walk the same road? That is a very good question! And one I’ll leave you to ponder. Thank you for reading a very long rant. It is most appreciated. Now, pack it away, and get on with your life.

Nam myoho renge kyo (Buddhist mantra)

Tim Alderman ©️ 2026